As Pesach approaches, it’s easy to get caught up in the details. We all do.The food. The timing. The pressure to get everything “right.”
But the Seder was never meant to be perfect.
It was meant to be powerful.
And for grandparents, it carries a unique opportunity.
Here are five things every grandparent needs to know to make the Seder meaningful:
1.Your role matters more than you think
The Seder is built on storytelling and memory.
Take a moment to reflect: What do you remember about your own grandparents at Pesach?
That is the role you are playing now, whether you realize it or not.
2. The Four Sons may actually be four generations
There is a beautiful way to understand the Four Sons not as four children, but as four generations sitting around the table.
Each one hears the story differently. Each one needs a different kind of response.
Your role is not to say one thing “correctly.” It is to help each person feel included in the story.
3.“B’chol dor v’dor” begins with you
Every generation is meant to see themselves as if they left Egypt.
But how does that happen?
Through story.
What was Pesach like when you were a child? What did freedom mean in your life? What was passed down to you?
Your story is what brings the Haggadah to life.
4. The Haggadah leaves out Moshe for a reason
Moshe, the great leader of the Exodus, is almost completely absent from the Haggadah.
Because the story is not about one person.
It is about a people.
And about a legacy that belongs to everyone.
At the Seder, what matters most is not being central.
It is being present, again and again, like Eliyahu Hanavi, who appears at every Seder across generations.
5. This is your time to become the grandparent you want to be
Pesach is not just one night.
It is the beginning of a journey: from freedom → to growth → to meaning.
That does not happen by accident. Join me in Becoming the Grandparent You Want to Be. This six-week small-group experience, from Pesach to Shavuot, will explore Torah wisdom, reflect on our own journeys, and build a practical plan for living our legacy with intention. I would love for you to join me.
You can learn more and register here.
https://grandplan.kit.com/profile/workshop
But that begins after Pesach. We must prepare for Passover first.
Three small steps to prepare for Pesach this week (that were not already on your list):
- Prepare one story. Think of one personal Pesach memory or life experience you want to share at the Seder or another time during the festival.
- See each grandchild. Like the Four sons, consider how each grandchild is different.
What question, story, or activity would help them connect?
- Plan one moment of connection. Plan one small, intentional moment for the grandchildren. It could be leading up to the seder, like a special video call of hearing them sing for the remote grandchildren. Trying a special recipe or folding oragami napkins for local grandchildren. It could be a shared code word during the seder. It could be anything. Just make it intentional.
Wishing you a meaningful and connected Pesach,
Sharona
Rabbanit Sharona Hassan
Founder of Grand Plan
PS - I have a new game for you to enjoy with your grandchildren this Pesach. Click here for the cards.
You can use them to play Charades (acting so players can guess the word)
You can use them to play Pictionary (drawing so players can guess the word)
You can use them to play Bricktionary (build with legos so players can guess the word)
You can print two sets and play Memory.
If you have another idea, or pictures of you playing with your grandchildren, please share.
In this week's podcast I explored the themes of this email in greater depth, like who was Eliyahu Hanavi's grandpather, and what role that plays in him coming to your seder?
Spotify: bit.ly/JewishPodcast
Apple: bit.ly/JewishGrandApple
