We have just come out of Pesach.
After all the preparation, the Seder, the family time, the conversations, the effort…
there is often a quiet question that follows:
Now what?
We carry so much with us out of Pesach.
Memories.
Emotions.
Moments of connection.
Maybe even some tension.
A sense of meaning… but not always clarity about how to hold onto it.
And then comes Parashat Shemini.
Shemini is a surprising Torah portion.
It contains very different elements:
- the completion of the Mishkan and the beginning of sacred service
- a moment of deep tragedy, with the loss of Aharon’s sons
- the practical laws of kosher animals
- and laws that, for the most part, we don’t actively observe today
It feels almost disjointed.
But it is also understood to be the midpoint of the Torah.
And perhaps that is exactly the point.
Because this is what life looks like, especially after a meaningful experience like Pesach.
We hold:
- the inspiration
- the reality
- what feels relevant
- and what feels distant
Not everything carries forward in the same way.
Not everything is meant to.
At the end of the parasha, there is a pasuk that reframes everything:
“You shall be kadosh, for I am kadosh.”
We often translate kadosh as “holy.”
But it also means: Distinct. Separate. Set apart.
And the very last lines of the portion speak about distinguishing between what is pure and impure, between what we take in and what we do not.
This is the bridge from Pesach into the rest of the year.
Pesach is powerful.
But it is also overwhelming.
Shemini comes and says:
You do not need to carry everything.
You need to choose.
What will you take with you from Pesach?
What will you leave behind?
What matters?
What doesn’t?
Where do you step in?
Where do you step back?
This is especially true in our relationships.
As grandparents, as parents, as family members.
We are constantly navigating:
- when to speak
- when to stay quiet
- when to give
- when to hold back
This is not accidental.
This is kedusha.
Not perfection.
But discernment.
And perhaps that is why this parasha comes now.
Not at the beginning.
Not at the end.
But right here, in the middle.
Because growth does not come from holding onto everything.
It comes from learning how to distinguish what truly matters.
As we count the days of the Omer, a time of small, steady growth, this becomes even more relevant.
Not big changes.
Just clearer choices.
Three small steps towards kedusha, holy discernment:
-
Choose what to carry forward. Take one quiet moment and ask yourself: What is one thing from Pesach I want to keep?A conversation. A feeling. A way you showed up.Write it down or say it out loud. Naming it is what makes it stay.
-
Practice one act of discernment. Once this week, pause before responding in a family interaction and ask: Then choose intentionally.That small moment of awareness is kedusha. Is this a moment to step in or step back?
-
Let one thing go. Not everything from Pesach needs to come with you. Choose one thing to release: a stress, an expectation, a dynamic that didn’t serve you This is not coming with me into the next stage. And consciously say: This is not coming with me into the next stage.
Wishing you a week of clarity, intention, and meaningful next steps,
Rabbanit Sharona Hassan
Founder of Grand Plan
P.S. Becoming the Grandparent You Want to Be starts this week! Sign up now to join this transformative six-week small-group experience. We will explore Torah wisdom, reflect on our own journeys, and build a practical plan for living our legacy with intention.
We’ll learn from the models of our Avot and Imaot, talk honestly about the joys and challenges of modern grandparenting, and leave with a clear vision for the role we want to play in our families.
Learn more and register here.https://grandplan.kit.com/profile/workshop
I would love to have you in this group.
P.P.S. Did you listen to the Connecting Jewish Grandparents: The Grand Plan Podcast this week?
Spotify: bit.ly/JewishPodcast
Apple: bit.ly/JewishGrandApple
